Very interesting thread @maddinii I think you're one of the best posters on here.
I am a solo player. I agree with a lot of your observations.
I haven't found squad leading/obeying or the system in general very rewarding. For a start, sometimes I don't even realise I've been given the SL. Sometimes I'm not interested in paying close attention and guiding others. I'm not a tank enthusiast so don't much care for extra points - I can get enough from normal play. And like you say, UAV is very good. I will pop those up as much as possible to help the team even on points I am no where near to.
In your first analogy (A1 on Warsaw), sometimes you can be 'flogging a dead horse' trying to take the same point over and over and in this case as SL I will go for a different target - this is not the SL not paying attention - this is a tactical choice - splitting the enemy.
I hate it when my team goes for the point nearest the enemy spawn - and leaves the rest of the map unchallenged - like, it's the farthest away for us and the closest to spawn for them???
If I am SL at early game i'll be taking one point and will target the other connected one so players go there instead; like taking C2 on Moscow i'll tell people to go C1. I also hate it when an SL targets an unrelated point. Bonkers!
A lot of the time I like to take long flanks and come at the enemy from unexpected directions so that doesn't always mean players will spawn on me because they think I am a sneaky rear echelon sniper or something.
I don't particularly chase kills so will often stick around two points to defend for a bit - like C1/2 on Warsaw. I hate it when you take a control point and people run off leaving the point undefended or haven't checked the area and not 50 metres away you hear the radio tell you someone is taking it back. Too many games are an endless running simulator going from point to point and the enemy is following behind re-taking them. Urgh! TZoningHard is right - people chase the action and just want maximum kills. You can't blame them. They've paid good money for a game and want to be entertained shooting someone's face off. And not everyone is an altruistic player helping their team at every opportunity. Hell I am ashamed to admit I sometimes get pissed off being the only tactically aware guy and the game is clearly lost so I just sneak about killing the enemy but not taking points so they don't know a threat is there.
At the end of the day, it doesn't take much to figure out the tactical nuances in this game and if you want to win I feel you have to both defend and attack points, but you can't do it as a solo a lot of the time. I am not sure if the current system works but I don't have a viable alternative. There are too many variables at play as well. The loss of a couple of players on one team can seriously weaken it, allowing the enemy team to control the map, especially with spawn camping the way it is. The introduction of a tank at just the right moment can give a team the winning momentum. But the games where my team is getting DESTROYED it certainly feels like it is because there are co-ordinated squads on the enemy team and none on mine.